Nice dice

It may have escaped your attention, but the truth is I am a collector. Of what? Hmm, I find it hard to narrow my gaze. I like nice things, and dice are indisputably nice. Here are a few of my favourites. 

There's one particular die that I am especially fond of. I found this die in a pile of tacky jewellery in the op shop, sadly separated from its accompanying board game. 

That's right, a Famous Five * die! To state the bleeding obvious, there are six sides to a traditional die, so we have Julian, Dick and Anne, George and Timmy the doo-ooo-oooog....what's on the sixth side?

But of course, it's a mystery! Jolly good then! Gosh, what about these....

...they must relate to sport (probably soccer?), but are also a little open ended, with a distinct melancholy flavour. That makes them twice as nice.
*WARNING - that Famous Five link will lead you to truly the worst singing you are ever likely to hear. It may already be too late. The moral of this story is pay attention to the asterisk!

Hound Dog

So....I just couldn't go past this sooky, slate eyed hound dog in the op shop. Bought for just $2 (half price!) at the RSPCA op shop, all my heart strings were plucked. Also, my funny bone was tickled. 

Get faxed

This t-shirt managed to worm its way into an opp shop...probably through some sort of space-time vortex.

Ex-Library

I woke up with a bad cold, then convinced myself that a trip to the local Scout Hall for the annual sale of decommissioned library books might help clear my head. Well, I was wrong. I found this charming book in the junior non-fiction section. It looks a bit like a cookbook, but don't be fooled kiddies. In Chapter 1/ Dissection : A Fun Way to Learn About Life, it is suggested "Perhaps the only thing you will not like about dissection is the clean up after you are done." I can think of a couple of other things...

Chapter 3/ Where To Get Specimens recommends "Slaughterhouses. You can find one by looking under "Abottoir" in the Yellow Pages. If there are no local slaughterhouses, you could visit one when you travel during vacations in the summertime. The parts can be frozen until you want to dissect them". Ahhh c'mon kids, what better way to while away a lazy summer holiday than visiting the abbatoirs, huh? I'll pack the esky! There is also an entire chapter on eyeball dissection..."If you want a surprise, look at the calf eye cornea and squeeze the eyeball hard." This book may force me to re-think commonly accepted theories on violence in video games. And lastly there is a project "Tying a Knot in a Chicken Bone". See, they told you dissection was fun! However, tying knots in bones is not a traditionally accepted practice of dissection...that belongs in the "Art With Carcasses" project book.

The Book of Riddles

Kaleidoscope World

Sometimes you find something so very cool & wonderful, but you know it's not meant to be yours. This little gem of a book 'The Art of Sewing : The Classic Techniques', published by Time-Life in 1974, is the perfect gift for my friend Amy. She is an avid crafter & has a crafty blog, you can check it out here ...Le Tigre Papillon. But oh my goodness, let's just take another look at the possibilities of craft as seen in this kaleidoscopic masterpiece....and that's only Chapter One! Praise Be The Craft!

Bon Ami, Mi Amore

Iconic design, complete with the kitchen sink. With Vinium* That must be the magical compound that cleans vinyl! There's still a bit left in the container, I shall sprinkle it liberally over my floors and wait for a 1950's housewife to appear to do the rest.

*I googled Vinium, it's so magical I can't find any information on it at all.

Hanging onto the telephone

iPhone? Who needs an iPhone? Certainly not this lady. She's more than happy with her beige handset, although the yellow kimono (dressing gown?) might also be lifting her mood. This poster was found bundled with rolls of silverfish-nibbled wallpaper in an op-shop barrel. No, you can't buy it from me.

Phone bills a little high? Why not time them? You can even cook an egg at the same time. This was one of today's Camberwell Market trinkets, and a nice counterpoint to the above poster.

Worst-case scenario

I've always had an uneasy feeling that I may end up becoming a bag lady. Well at least I'll have some nice bags...

(suitcase linings)

Student's World

Yet more op shop books bought solely for their covers...will I ever learn?

(L > R; Volume 8 - Early Development of Australia, Volume 1 - First Steps in Learning, Volume 10 - Manufacturing Industry & National Traditions)

Avant-lard

A relic from the old days, pre-cholesterol concerns, when animal fat was stored & used for toast, fry-ups & pastries . These days some people seem far more afraid of fat than drugs. C'mon folks, try some experiments with lard!

It's My Party

A few snippets from this book, published in 1977.

"Giving a party should be fun - fun for the giver and fun for the guests. But it is not always so. When your guests have gone home, you could be left thinking: "Where did it all go wrong?" If so, it is very likely that it went wrong when you said: "Let's have a party!"

"Did you think what you were going to do? Did you plan? Or did you hope that it would work out? The best parties are planned parties. But only you should know all the work that goes into them."

"Don't talk about the party in front of too many people. Never, never use the telephone. Many parties come to an end because of that danger of dangers, the gatecrasher."

"Ask a friend to help you by giving people a welcome drink and keeping the record player going, while you help new guests with their things."

"All too soon the party is over. As you close the door on the last guest, and look around, you will see it: your room - the place you took so long to make nice. Ashtrays full to the top...glasses and dirty plates everywhere...chairs pushed here and there. This is the time when you find a drink, put on a lively record and then turn to with a will. Lot's of hard work - Yes! But now you know you can give a party - a good party. So here's to the next!"

Science by design

They just don't design science books like they did in the 1950's, do they? I believe this cover is by Robert Jonas, an American illustrator (1907 - 1997). The genetics modesty panel is inspired!

Survival with vinyl

Problem - a day off work sick with the flu, unable to function normally.

Solution - spin some rescued $1 vinyl and don't fight it!

I have determined the record 'Golden Mexican Hits for Dancing Vol. 6' is especially good for the hallucinatory aspects of the flu, while Francoise Hardy helps when your brain simply can't operate in English mode anymore & suddenly, miraculously, can understand French. Also, Roberta Flack is good in the bath.

Choice cuts

I'm no expert but I'm pretty sure I know where the 'butt' & 'jowl' stickers really belong on this pig.

1, 2, 3, GO!

Monophonic and hopelessly outmoded, its white keys have yellowed with the years like teeth. Cheesy preset rhythms + gorgeous warm chord keys = hours of fun... plus, it can be tuned with a screwdriver! We remember 1983 for the Casio PT-50, and bless those country op shops.

Antique snails

Sunday morning, Camberwell Market, just another box of odds & ends. A gentle shake of this match box felt oddly light. Inside I discovered nine snails shells collected from Lord Howe island in 1928, collected by 'Stone', according to the inked tag. Antique snails! Vintage gastropods! In order not to draw attention to my stupendous scientific find, I nonchalantly offered the seller 20 cents. This event is now referred to as The Great Snail Swindle.

...just when you thought it was safe to get back in the water.

Favourites

One of my all time favourite op-shop treasures – a red light globe filled with 140 matches with the metaphorical tag ‘Light Up!’ I keep that close, on the discarded hall table that serves as a computer station. And another, a relic from the Darebin Resource Recovery Centre (aka Darebin tip). This was before they built the soulless tin shed, tripled their prices and ditched half of their staff. I found this collage on a piece of rough hewn corrugated board, lost amongst the paperbacks, and took it to the counter for pricing. They said I could have it for free. I walked away feeling like I’d found a Pollock in an op-shop for a song. I like to imagine the Nonna that pieced it together from devotional cards kept from homeland churches, cutting down a fruit box with the blunt scissors she stored in the kitchen drawer. Many of my friends just find this creepy.

Are We Not Human?

I may have to start a band called 'The Human Body', just to use this as the cover art for the debut self-titled EP. Typophiles, please enjoy the 'O' and the 'D', and that snug little 'Y'.